Give it away

Almost two years ago, my life was radically different.  Not in the sense of- oh, I had different perspectives and ideals, but literally in every essence of my existence my life took on a different shade of who I am today. And it was because once again, I lost something great- after having lost something else precious.  But it wasn't the end. It never is, and that was the beginning of the transformation to where I sit today. Since I have walked this journey from much to little via the path of anger and pain and resentment, I have learned to both let go and hold on more tightly. It's the what that's changed.

I look around at my life and who I have become and realize I have become better by releasing my connection to that which I own in a material way. Before I would second guess giving up something if I thought I might someday need it. Today, I give it up without a second thought if someone needs it. It's not because of my own piety or greatness, but because I realize that things are not proof of worth, but if they can be used elsewhere I don't need them. Things can always be replaced. Life goes on without them.

What I have also learned in this process is the opposite of that which I've chosen for material possessions. People will never be the replaceable and those that love or respect you on the same level as you do them should be cherished. My circle has shrank, mostly by death or relocation, and more recently by choice.  I have learned to be gracious in the loss and to grieve it for what it is and be thankful for what I gained in love from the experience rather than what I lost in the leaving.

Life is a grand scale balancing the good with the bad. We will not always win, but we will not always lose. The greatest reward in all of it is go take away a lesson that will serve us in the future, and if it happens to hone our awareness of the sanctity of our existence in the process then so be it :)